Expectations

Today wasn't what I expected it to be. After waiting over a year since my last marathon to try again, I was really expecting to blow it out of the water with a 3:35. Even so, my strategy was to start out conservatively (slower than BQ pace) and then negative split.

Expectations & Training Analysis:

All the signs pointed to a BQ (3:40) being attainable, with something like 3:35 being perfectly realistic.

1. In March 2008, I ran a 3:51:49. This was based on a 7-week training cycle, averaging about 40 miles per week. Since then, I have had quite a few marathon training cycles, each one peaking at 55 miles per week or more, and each one at least 12 weeks in length. I would expect significant improvement based on this training.

2. In March 2009, I ran a half marathon at 1:44:04. This predicts a marathon from 3:37-3:40, depending on whose calculator you use. This was over a year ago, and my fitness level has increased significantly since then, and I have continued to train with weekly mileage in the 40s and 50s.

3. Most recently, I ran a 5-miler in 37:10 and a 5K in 22:21. Both of these races predict times faster than 3:40. Although one could argue that you can't predict marathon times based on these calculators, I have always found my longer races (half marathons and full marathons) to be "faster" than their equivalent shorter races. In other words, endurance is my strength. My body works aerobically at a higher percentage of max heart rate than most people, which correlates to better performance in longer races.

4. Two weeks ago, I ran 18.5 miles at an average 8:33 pace, and I had sped up during the last five miles to an 8:20 pace. I felt great, and I thought I could have continued at a 8:33 pace or faster for at least another 3-4 miles. This was despite the heat (in the 70's) and humidity.

5. The largest indicator was the fact that my paces per heart rate had dropped dramatically. I do all of my easy runs at a heart rate of 155-165. This is my "easy zone" according to a VO2 max test I took. With that in mind, my average training paces for the past 5 months have been:

January: 9:16

February: 8:59

March: 8:52

April: 8:45

May: 8:44

I figured that to BQ, I would only need to run 20 seconds per mile faster than my easy pace.

For "marathon pace runs" I would target a HR of 165-174. This would usually correlate to an 8:10 or sometimes faster. This heart rate zone is below my lactate threshold zone. Most importantly, it felt like marathon pace. Just a tiny bit faster than "easy".

Today's Race

I went into this race with a great deal of confidence. I wasn't sick or injured, and the weather was reasonable. It was in the mid 50's and overcast at the start and rose to the low 60's and sunny at the end. These aren't ideal conditions for me, but they are decent, and I didn't think they would make me bonk.

I started out at a very controlled pace. I reached the halfway point at 1:51:45, which is a slower average than BQ pace. I knew that the first half was a net uphill and the second half was a net downhill, so I did this purposely. I figured that I could easily log 8:10's on the way back and smash the BQ. Only that's not what happened.

Things did get much easier after the halfway point, and I logged an 8:16, 8:22, 8:17. But after that, I could feel myself starting to fade. 8:17 became 8:30 became 8:40 became 9:00 and so on. I knew at mile 16 that I wasn't going to keep the pace I needed to BQ, but I was still hopeful about a nice PR. This is very similar to how I felt in New Jersey last spring.

I was miserable. I was in so much pain and I didn't know why it got so hard for me. I was well hydrated (carried a bottle for most of the race) plenty of Gels, calories, etc. I had slept well the past few nights. I was a bit suspicious of that 18.5 miler two weeks ago, but that seriously felt "easy". Going into the race, I was a somewhat worried that I had missed my peak. I think I felt strongest in mid-April when I ran that 5K. All of my training was targeted toward a March 22 race, and then I just kept tapering, ramping up, tapering, etc. There was no structured "training plan" for today's marathon. I was just banking on the training I had been doing since September.

Even still, I don't think that any of this really explains what happened out there. Maybe the weather wasn't perfect. Maybe I missed my peak. But still-- I am in so much better shape than I was two years ago and yet I couldn't even beat that time!

In complete agony (both physical and mental), I crossed the finish line in 3:53:55. I do think this is a respectable time, but nowhere near what I am capable of. My fiancé was waiting for me, and I knew he understood exactly what I was going through. I didn't need to say a word. I was in shock, I was drained, I was in pain-- I felt broken in so many ways. I didn't speak for a good 10 minutes. I regretted not having gone for the PR two weeks ago. I regretted not "racing" the GW Parkway 10-miler at full effort when I was feeling amazing. I felt stupid. I felt I had sacrificed so much for this one goal, and I didn't even come close.

I started crying. I just felt so crushed, so defeated and so ashamed for having been so cocky. Guilty, even, for having solicited the support of so many of my runner friends. And that I let them down.

The race director approached me and asked me how I did, I just looked at him with tears in my eyes and said that I didn't do it. (He had known he was a BQ attempt for me). Everything I had worked so hard for. . . it all came down to this.

I met my friends shortly after and I perked up a bit.

What I Learned

Maybe there was a higher power at work trying to teach me something by not letting me BQ or PR. Part of the reason I wanted this so badly was to cross it off my list and move on. I've been obsessing about it throughout my entire engagement and it's overshadowed the happiest time of my entire life! I guess what I've learned is that BQ or no BQ, I need to change my focus. I am extremely motivated and goal-oriented-- and it typically "works" to get me what I want. But for some reason, not in this case. And I think that reason is that I need to see the bigger picture of my life, appreciate what I have, and focus on all the wonderful changes.

As with all of my best races, it will come when I least expect it to. The week before I ran my 3:51 back in 2008, I thought I was seriously injured. I thought I'd probably have to drop out at mile 5. But instead, I exceeded my goal. In London, I was also injured and expected to drop out. But instead, I exceeded my goal. When I ran the Houston half marathon in 2008, I had been injured for three weeks, and I expected a 2:00 "fun run". Instead, I PRed with a 1:50. Completely unexpected. Two weeks ago, I wasn't even trying to run a marathon, but I ran a good percentage of it at an awesome pace given the weather conditions. When I least expected it.

From now on I think I need to go into races with no expectations. I should know where I am at fitness wise and what to target, but ultimately, I need to realize that every race is a gamble, an unknown. No matter how much training you do or how great you feel, the race could still be miserable. Or, no matter how badly you feel or how unprepared you are, you could rock it! I put far too much pressure on myself and from now on I am just going to back off and let it happen. With that approach, do I worry that I won't be as motivated to train? A little. But I know I will be more balanced if I keep a more laid back approach to this whole thing.

So. . . . what next? I'm running the NYC marathon with my fiancé. He got accepted through the lottery and it's going to be his first one. I am running it for charity. I'm going to focus on raising the $3,000 for the Central Park Conservancy, and coaching him to his first marathon finish. NYC is not a course to PR on (very crowded, lots of hills) and my intention with this race is to enjoy it with my fiancé. I'll create a training plan for him, train with him, and then run the race with him. The BQ is going to be out of sight and out of mind for awhile. I have a bunch of shorter races between now and then and I am just going to get out there and see what happens.

BQ or Bust!

Wednesday

On Wednesday of this week, I could tell that the weather forecast for today's marathon would not be in my favor. I decided that I would take the early start option (6:00am) and hope that the cloud cover they were predicting would be enough to save me from heat exhaustion.

Thursday

On Thursday morning, the first thing I did when I woke up was check the weather forecast again. Much to my dismay, they had added humidity into the mix, and raised the high from 87 to 93. The low went from 64 to 72. Yikes! Based on this, I knew there would be no way I could BQ. I have run marathons and half marathons in these conditions and I've always preformed poorly. Furthermore, I thought it would be dangerous for me to even run a marathon in these conditions.

I cried. I just started crying my eyes out. Yet ANOTHER marathon with unseasonably hot weather. Was someone up there laughing about me? I was about to go for a morning run and it was 45 degrees. Why couldn't the marathon be that day? Why couldn't the cold weather just hold on? It was so unfair. I've been chasing this BQ for so long. I know that I am more than capable of a 3:40 (I am thinking more like 3:35) and yet the weather always comes in and messes it up for me.

My fiancé and I went for our morning run and 5 miles turned into 7 miles. What's the point in taking it easy for a marathon that I knew I wasn't going to run? When we got back from our 7 miles, I hopped onto MarathonGuide.com and found the Bob Potts Heritage Trail marathon two weeks later. Even though the weather is more likely to be warm later in the spring, I didn't think it could get much worse than a high of 93. That's like a July marathon. Bob Potts appealed to me for three reasons:

1. It was within driving distance (just 2 hours away)

2. The course was mainly flat

3. It had a 6:30am start time

Later that day I mailed in my registration form.

Friday

On Friday, I decided to do a semi-challenging run to make up for the shorter, easier runs I had been doing during the taper. I ran a 10-mile progression run. The first 5 miles were at an easy pace, with my fiancé. He stopped there and I continued on for another 5, and I decided that increase my pace by 0:10/mile with each one. The last five miles were 8:37, 8:24, 8:12, 8:04 and 7:42. It felt awesome! While I was doing this run, I realized that there was no going back now. Doing a 10-mile progression run two days before a marathon is not something you're supposed to do!

Saturday

On Saturday, I emailed the race director and told him not to expect me because I thought it would be dangerous to run a marathon with the forecast I had seen. He said he was really bummed out about not getting to meet me, and suggested coming out for a training run. I told him I would run halfway and potentially more if I felt up to it. He then told me that other people were just doing half, so they were going to score a half marathon, too. Running-wise, I ran 5 easy miles on Saturday morning.

Sunday

I woke up, got dressed, took one Honey Stinger Gel from the pantry as well as a water bottle and headed out. When I got to the race, I started chatting with other runners. I told them that my plan was to just go halfway, and maybe a few miles after that if I felt okay. I told them about how I wanted to qualify for Boston, and I knew it wasn't going to happen in this weather, so I was going to wait two weeks for the Bob Potts marathon.

We started at 6:00. The race was an out-and-back on the C&O Canal Towpath-- done twice. So it was about 6.25 miles to the turnaround point. My goal was to keep my heart rate in the easy range, and maybe push a bit more toward the end. Here is a mile-by-mile recap.

1- 8:42 (Lots of women are passing me. That's okay.)

2- 8:37

3- 8:42 I stopped at a water station for about 1 minute and chatted with one of the volunteers who I knew.

4- 8:55 There was a tree branch blocking the course, so I decided to move it out of the way for everyone.

5- 8:44 (Okay, back running again. Keep that heart rate in the easy zone!)

6- 8:40 (Still in the easy zone, and I am passing people!)

7- 8:36 (The girl I just passed is completely out of breath, I wonder if she'll make it the whole way)

8- 8:51 (Yay, I passed another woman!)

9- 8:33 (Wow, I can't believe it's already been 9 miles.)

10- 8:30 (Oooh, someone just told me I was the "first chick")

11- 8:26 (Maybe I will speed up a bit!)

12- 8:48 (Damn, this still feels easy!)

13- 8:26 (I could stop and get a 1:52 half marathon, but I want to turnaround and keep running.)

14- 8:21 (I feel great! Maybe I can BQ. I just need to average about 8:02 for the rest of the race.)

15- 8:03 (Yes, I can BQ!)

16- 8:18 (Well. . . maybe I'll just go for first female)

17- 8:16 (I'll end up with a 3:44 which will still be awesome. I'm gonna go for it!)

18- 8:31 (actually, I am getting tired, probably should drop out, I want a BQ, not a PR.)

I ran a total of 18.5 miles at an average 8:33 pace and I was the first female by about three minutes. I stopped at the water station and the volunteers asked me if I was okay. I was perfectly fine, but I told them my dilemma: PR today, or BQ in two weeks? None of them knew what to tell me. I called my fiancé using one of the volunteer's cell phones. I told him my dilemma. He didn't know what to say. I told him I would run for a bit longer and potentially finish the race.


I started running again, but then turned right back around and decided to stop. I realized that my legs were tired, and if I went for it, my legs wouldn't be recovered in time for the Bob Potts marathon.

It was a tough decision. I was feeling a lot better than I expected to. I think that my problem withthe heat is actually more the sun. Yesterday I was standing out in the sun at a garden shop and I felt completely zonked and like I wanted to lay down. But as soon as I got home, I totally perked up. I fared much better at this race then I did at Shamrock, and Shamrock was only 65 degrees when I bonked. The difference was the sun. Today was hot and humid, but the overcast sky definitely helped.

Other factors that I was thinking about during my run was that I had just done a 10-mile progression run two days ago, and my legs would feel that starting at mile 20. Additionally, I only had one Honey Gel. I could maybe overcome that by drinking a lot of sports drink at the aid stations, but it wouldn't be ideal.

So, BQ or bust. I hope I don't regret my decision and that in two weeks, I will get a 3:35 at the Bob Potts marathon!

Training Update: 1 Week to Go!

Life has been such a roller coaster for me lately. On April 2, my fiancé and I closed on our new house. It was a foreclosure so there was a lot of work to be done to it before we moved in. We had two weeks before we moved in to get all the walls painted and all the floors replaced (except for the kitchen floor). There is such a long list of things that the previous owners neglected or took from the house, so I've been dealing with that on top of training and my full time job. Oh yeah, and planning a wedding!

We finally moved in on April 16 and everything went smoothly. I am in a whole new running world now. It used to be impossible to run out of my front door because there was construction going on in every direction, and it was all major roads with no sidewalks. There was the option to drive 2 miles to the trail, but it was dangerous to be on the secluded trail without Greg. Because of this, the majority of my runs were on a gym treadmill.

Now, I simply go out of my front door and start running. The area is full of running paths which are all well-lit and near roads, so they seem pretty safe. In fact, a "run-able" area was a key decision factor in choosing a new home. There was one beautiful home that Greg and I really loved, but as soon as you left the neighborhood, you were on a narrow road with no paths. With our new home, I feel safe running alone in the morning when it's still dark out, but usually Greg joins me anyway. Most of the area is constant rolling hills, which I am not used to. The W&OD trail basically consists of a lot of inclines and declines, but not rolling hills. This is definitely a more challenging terrain and I think it will make me stronger. I don't even have treadmill access, so it's outside or nothing!

I feel like at some point in mid-February, I made a huge leap in fitness. It happened very suddenly. I always thought that running improvement should be a gradual process. But instead, I was pretty much running at the same level for awhile, but then I all of a sudden had a massive improvement. The first indication of this was my heart rate. My "easy" pace is dictated by a heart rate of 155-165 according to the VO2 max test I took last June. I noticed that I started going a lot faster at that heart rate, and it still felt easy to me. For the longest time, my easy runs and long runs were in the 9:15-9:40 range. And now they are in the 8:40-9:00 range. Sometimes I log miles that are at at BQ pace (8:25) that are in my "easy" HR zone. This is when it's flat or downhill.

The second indication was a 5-mile race at a pace of 7:26. Considering this was a faster pace than any 5K I had ever run, I knew it was a huge improvement. And then of course, there was the 5K a few weeks ago when I dropped my PR by 1:01. And I have to mention that during both of these races, the weather cooperated. Both were very windy, but wind doesn't affect me nearly as much as heat.

My training has been going well:

Week of March 22: 40.5 miles (17-mile long run)

Week of March 29: 52 miles (19-mile long run)

Week of April 5: 53 miles (21-mile long run)

Week of April 12: 45 miles (15-mile long run)

Week of April 19: 38 miles after I complete my 10-miler on Sunday

My attitude for this marathon has been way more relaxed than any other marathon. Maybe because it's so small. Maybe because I'm just really confident given my training and my recent race times. Maybe it's because I have been so focused on the move and the wedding. I have to admit to taking a peak at the extended forecast and not liking the fact that they keep increasing the high temperature every time I look. :-( But honestly, at this point, it's almost become a farce. I know I am capable of a sub-3:40 and if it doesn't happen it's not going to make me feel any worse about my running or what I've been doing. I'm going to stay relaxed about this marathon and just do my best.

5K: Massive PR

Last night I ran one of the Crystal City 5K Fridays. I had run one of these last year and really enjoyed it. This race is put on by Pacers Running Stores, so it felt great to be out there wearing my Pacers Ambassador shirt.

Background

I ran my first 5K in September 2006. Since then my times have not changed much. I've made significant improvements in the half marathon and full marathon since then, but my 5K was pretty much static:

Sept 2006: 24:07
Nov 2006: 23:32
June 2007: 23:30
Nov 2007: 24:19
April 2008: 23:58
Nov 2008: 23:22 (PR)
April 2009: 23:30

Nov 2009: 23:40

This was very frustrating for me because I had been working so hard over the years to be a faster runner and yet the 5K wasn't really coming down.

Pre-Race

I'm very much of a morning runner, so evening races tend to throw me for a loop. But I made sure to hydrate well during the day and eat foods that wouldn't upset my stomach. Greg and I arrived to the race and picked up our bibs. We warmed up for 1.5 miles. I was worried that my Garmin couldn't get a satellite signal during the warmup. Finally, about 5 minutes before the race start, Greg held my Garmin up in the air and it got a signal.

Race Conditions

The weather was about 56 degrees, sunny and very windy. The wind was the biggest challenge of this course. The course was mainly flat, with a few inclines. My goal was to go sub-23:00, and I was fairly certain I could be in the 22:40s if I tried.

The Race

The race started and I went out fast. My Garmin initially had me going at a pace of 6:30, but I wasn't sure that I trusted it, based on how look it took to get a signal. I decided to just run by feel and not really trust the Garmin. (These splits are according to Garmin)

Mile 1: 6:50

When I realized that I had run a 6:50 for the first mile, I thought to myself "what have I done?" But I continued onwards. It was really tough running directly into wind gusts and I didn't have anyone to draft off of. I just kept telling myself I could turn around soon! The hairpin turns in this race (3 of them) were not fun, but I think I handled them as best as I could.

Mile 2: 7:05

I knew at this point that I had a strong PR "in the bag" and I just had to maintain my focus. I started to trust my Garmin a little more, although the mile markers indicated slightly longer miles than my Garmin. I passed a ton of people in the last mile. I pushed as hard as I could. I kept telling myself: There's a new 5K PR just up ahead. All you have to do is run there to get it. The faster you run to get it the better it will be!

Mile 3: 7:04

When I was approaching the finish line, I gave a final kick and saw a 22:xx on the clock and was so excited!

Official time: 22:21

This is a PR by 1:01, which is huge for a 5K!

Average race pace was 7:12. This is a discrepancy from my Garmin, partially due to weaving, and partially because with all the tall buildings, maybe my Garmin wasn't completely accurate. I don't know how I placed because Pacers doesn't list results by age group and gender. There were definitely some strong runners out there, but I held my own!

Reflections

Now that it's been a week since the Shamrock marathon attempt, I've really started to contemplate my running philosophy. I don't have a single regret about the DNF because there was no way I could have finished given the state that I was in. Even if I had been able to run/walk to the finish, I would have gotten one of my slowest times ever, after putting in one of my best training cycles in ever.

A lot of runners say "take what the day gives you" and make the most out of unfavorable racing conditions. I agree with this if you are going for an age group award, or if it's a shorter race where you can bounce back quickly and then enter another one. However, I have a very specific marathon goal. I've woken up at 5:00am or earlier nearly every day for the past two years in pursuit of this goal. I've made a lot of sacrifices so that I could put in the training time necessary to run a good marathon. Throwing it away on a day when the weather makes it impossible to meet this goal would just be stupid.

As I said in my last blog, the warm weather affects me much more than most runners, so I just have to accept that and lower my expectations for warm/hot races.

I am faster now than I ever have been. I just ran a 5-mile race at a pace of 7:26, which is faster than my 5K PR. And I've run quite a few 5Ks. Furthermore, my "easy" pace has sped up from 9:45 from last summer down to about 8:55. "Easy" pace for me correlates to a HR of 155-165. Additionally, when I run an 8:55 pace now on my easy runs, it feels like 9:30 used to feel.

If I had actually been able to run all the marathons I have trained for over the past two years (without the illness, injury, and weather situations) then I am sure I would have set a few PRs. Every time I "miss" a marathon, the training doesn't go away so I just build on that for the next one. So I have about 5 training cycles built up-- so my goal for my next one is going to be faster than my goal for the fall 2008 marathon that I had to pass on because I was sick.

As for my next marathon, I have decided to not run the New Jersey marathon. The main reason is because of the 9:00am start time. Last year, the race started at 8:00am, but it was delayed by 30 minutes because their shuttle system wasn't efficient. So instead of addressing the shuttle system, they are simply starting the race an hour later. Not only does this translate into warmer weather, but it's also off-schedule with what my body is used to. I typically begin my long runs at 8:00 or earlier, and my weekday runs at 5:00.

Instead, I found a marathon that's only a 20-minute drive from my house-- the Potomac River Run Marathon on May 2. This marathon is an out-and-back twice, on a dirt/gravel trail. It starts at 7:00am, it's mostly shaded, is limited to 300 runners, and is chip timed. My fiance will be able to position himself on the course so that he will see me four times, and that support will really help me. Plus, we won't have to invest in a hotel room and another road trip. This will be low-key and I'm not putting the pressure on myself that I did for Shamrock. Over the next 5 weeks, I will be moving to my new house, so there is a lot of other stuff that needs to be dealt with.

This morning, my fiance went out to the C&O canal towpath where the marathon is going to be held. I figured I should do a long run on the course so I would be better prepared for the terrain. I ended up running 17 miles at an average pace of 9:01. Average heart rate was 158. Of course, it was nearly perfect running weather today. Completely overcast and mid 40's. Where was this weather last weekend!!???

Anyway, I have been a bit depressed this past week, but I have made peace with my situation. I know I have a BQ (actually more like a 3:35) in me. I just need to get out there and do it!

Limitations

Background

4 weeks ago I ran 18 miles at an average pace of 8:45. Miles 9-17 (8 miles total) averaged a pace of 8:13. This was my projected marathon pace. The 8 miles felt only slightly challenging and I truly believed that I could have continued on at that pace for awhile. It was 35 degrees and sunny. The next day, my legs felt great and there were no signs of soreness or fatigue.

Yesterday, I ran 13.5 miles at an average pace of 8:30 and did not feel like I could run any farther. Today, my legs feel like I put out a major race effort and I'll probably need a week to recover fully.

The difference? About 25 degrees.

Pre-Race

When I realized that the weather for the Shamrock Marathon in VA Beach was going to be sunny and in the 60's, I pretty much knew that a BQ wasn't going to happen. I posted this on my Facebook and on Runner's World online. The reaction was that I needed to think positively and have confidence. However, I wasn't being negative. I was simply being realistic. I ran the Rock 'n Roll Arizona marathon in similar conditions and I bonked. I had to run/walk from mile 15 to the finish and then it took me three weeks to recover fully. The experience was miserable, I was disappointed with my time, and I was left completely beat up and not able to train at my normal capacity for another month.

I was trying to be positive about Shamrock, so I even made a list of things that were going to be different from Arizona. For example, I was better rested and there was no time zone change. I was also in much better shape and down about 5 pounds. I thought that maybe with these things going for me I had a shot, but ultimately I knew that a BQ simply wasn't realistic.

The Race

On race morning, I headed to the start with a positive outlook. I was calm and I was determined to do my best. I wore sunglasses, a visor, my sports bra and a running skirt. No headphones.

I started off at a pace of 8:25 and it felt ridiculously easy. It felt like "marathon pace" felt when I did my best performance ever back in 2008. It was short lived, however, once we came to an area that was unshaded and the sun was rising higher in the sky.

Things started to get tough at mile marker 9 but I held the pace anyway. At mile marker 10 I felt like I was racing at half-marathon effort but I still maintained the pace. At mile marker 11, I knew that my race was over. It all happened very quickly. I didn't feel uncomfortably hot. I just got extremely tired and exhausted. I had no choice but to slow to a 9:00 pace, and then to a 9:15 pace. Swarms of people started passing me and I just couldn't keep up. I wanted to stop after mile 11 but I knew that my fiance was waiting for me at mile 13.5.

I continued on and I saw some friends from the Runner's World forums after mile 12. I stopped running to hug them and I realized how horrible I felt. I don't think I could even communicate properly at that point. I felt like I might pass out. I told them that I had to run to mile 13.5 where my fiance would be. I continued on, running at about a 9:30 pace and my friend Lindsay passed me. I told her that I was struggling really bad and that I wasn't going to finish. I wanted to keep up with her pace (8:50) until I reached 13.5, but I couldn't.

Lindsay was running with the 3:50 pace group. Back in 2008 when I ran this marathon, I ran with the 3:50 pace group from about mile 13 to mile 22. And now, two years later, after much more training than I ever did for the 2008 race, this pace group was passing me at the halfway point. In fact, when I ran the race in 2008, my peak mileage was 45 MPW and my average was in the upper 30's. In preparation for yesterday's race, I had averaged 50 MPW, peaking at 57. I knew that I was in substantially much better shape, and yet I just felt so extremely drained. (Note: the weather in 2008 was low 40's and overcast).

When I reached mile 13.5 I stopped and I just felt horrible. I could barely even talk to my fiance. He pulled me over into a shaded area and sat me down on the ground. He had water, a bag of ice, a cookie and a granola bar with him. I hung out there for about 30 minutes before I felt ready to walk back to the hotel.

The DNF

This is the first marathon out of 10 that I Did Not Finish (DNF). At mile 11, when I was coming to terms with the fact that my race was doomed, I asked myself if I would regret it if I stopped. And the answer was an immediate no. I knew that one of these three things would happen:

• I would continue to push at an 8:25 pace and pass out.
• I would run/walk to the finish like I did in Arizona with a mediocre time and then not recover for 3-4 weeks.
• I would stop at mile 13.5 and cut my losses.

I chose the third option and I have no regrets. If it hadn't been for Arizona then perhaps I would have continued. But I learned a valuable lesson in Arizona and that's that my body has limitations in sunny weather. Even in the 50's and 60's where many runners are absolutely fine. I simply don't tolerate it. If I had Arizona to do over again, I would have stopped at the halfway point. I wasn't about to make the same mistake twice.

The tough thing for me is that I am so much less heat tolerant than the average runner. No one was slowing down at mile 11. I heard of people having to slow down at mile 18 or 20, but not at mile 11. I even "bonked" at the Cherry Blossom 10-miler (at mile 6) last year when it was sunny and 55. When I told my runner friends that it was too hot and sunny for me, it was hard for them to believe. Sunny and 55 are the ideal race conditions for a lot of people.

As I was slowing down, another runner encouraged me to keep going. I said that I was not going to finish. He said "Walk if you have to. Just do whatever it takes to finish the race." I completely disagree with this. Granted, he didn't know me or my marathon history. But why would I kill myself to make it to the finish line of a marathon that I have already completed, just to do it slower and then be beat up for the next three weeks? What would I gain? I would have hated myself for making such a poor choice. And this is if I even made it that far and didn't pass out before getting there.

The bottom line is that I know what my body can and can't handle. My limitations with regards to sunny/warm weather are greater than most runners. I should not attempt to run a marathon in conditions that make it impossible to meet my goal. Especially considering how much time and effort I put into training. I really thought I would be safe with a March 21 marathon, but apparently I was not.

Looking Ahead

I now have the option of throwing in the towel for Boston 2011 or attempting again at the New Jersey marathon in six weeks. I suppose I will try to preserve everything I have worked so hard for since October and try again in New Jersey. But if they are calling for sunny and a high of 60 or greater, then I just won't make the drive. I'm getting married in August so running an early fall marathon is out of the question. If it's not NJ, then my next attempt will either be NYC in November or Memphis in December.

What upsets me most is that I have not had a positive marathon experience in over two years. And the irony of this is that my fitness level has significantly improved during this time period. My last good marathon was at Shamrock in 2008. Ever since then there has been a major illness, an injury, two cases of heat exhaustion and one case of hypothermia. My first 6 marathons were so wonderful. I just want to experience that joy again.

Five Confidence-Boosting Miles

This morning I ran the Van Metre 5-Mile Run for Children's Hospital in Ashburn, VA. I had run this race back in 2007, but the course was mis-measured that year and was actually 5.2 miles so I didn't get an accurate time. My pace for the first 4 miles had been a 7:48, so I had some idea of how I performed. The purpose of the race today was to be a "tune-up" for the Shamrock marathon in two weeks. Pfitzinger recommends an 8K-10K tune-up two weeks out and that has usually worked well for me in the past.

I had no idea what to shoot for this morning. Based on my half marathon time from early December, I should have been able to run a 7:30 pace. However, I am in much better shape now, but I also can't run the shorter races as fast as McMillan predicts. I figured I would be happy with anything in the 7:35-7:45 range. My fiance, Greg, wanted to run a 7:30 pace so we started together.

The weather was sunny, windy, and about 35 degrees. The wind was a factor in certain parts of the race, but I have run in much worse. The course was rolling hills, except for there was a significant hill at the end of the first mile.

Mile 1: 7:39

This was the slowest mile of the race. Mainly because I wasn't sure what I was capable of and also because there was a big hill at the end of the mile. I think I had been averaging about 7:25 until that hill showed up. Greg was behind me until we got to the hill and he was able to take it faster than me.

Mile 2: 7:29

At the top of the hill, it took me awhile to recover. I think I was going at a pace of 8:30 for at least the first quarter mile. I caught up with Greg, who was also recovering, but then he sped ahead.

Mile 3: 7:29

Gently rolling hills.

Mile 4: 7:31

More rolling hills, trying to hang in there! I knew at this point that I would meet my approximate goal, so I just wanted to hang on.

Mile 5: 7:15

I was shocked at my ability to pull this off. The mile started off downhill and I just hammered on it. I was averaging a 7:05 pace for the first half mile and feeling awesome. Then there was a slight uphill to the finish. I tried to catch Greg, but he stayed about 10 seconds ahead of me for the entire race.

Time: 37:10

Average pace: 7:26

This race was HUGE for me in many respects.

1. I have never run a race at this pace. Ever. Not another 5-miler, not an 8K, not a 4-miler, not even a 5K! In fact, if I look at the last three miles, I beat my 5K PR. Part of me wishes this was a 5K or a 10K so I could have set a major PR in a more standard distance. So, my 5K PR will remain at a pace of 7:31, but I know I am capable of faster.

2. The running equivalent calculators, like McMillan and others, indicate that an "equivalent" marathon performance would fall below 3:40. For most people, this wouldn't necessarily mean much. But because I am stronger at longer distances, I believe I can run even faster than what these calculators predict. The reason why is because of reason 3. . . .

3. My heart rate stayed in my Lactate Threshold (LT) zone. This is tempo pace. I have a very hard time pushing past that threshold in shorter races. Greg's heart rate was far above his LT zone-- as it should be for a race of this distance. But I couldn't push any harder. It's very difficult for me to push beyond my LT zone, but I can stay it in for a long time. I definitely felt like I could have gone a few more miles at this pace. But I didn't feel like I could speed up. When it comes to a marathon, I will be running just under my LT zone. Now that I now that my true LT zone equates to about a 7:26 pace, running a marathon at the BQ pace of 8:23 should definitely be doable.

No age group awards today-- there were quite a few strong runners out there. But now my confidence has been sufficiently boosted for the marathon in two weeks. I just need to make sure that I don't get sick between now and then and hope for decent weather (not wanting to have rainy hypothermia again)!

Shamrock, here I come!!!!!!

Snowy Days

As you know, the Washington DC metro area has been hit hard with snow over the past two weeks. I've been relegated to the treadmill for all of my runs, and it doesn't look like I will run outside again for awhile. They don't typically plow the trail that I run on, so I just have to wait for it to melt. And with several feet of snow and temperatures in the 30's for the foreseeable future, melting is highly unlikely. I don't live in a neighborhood that I can run around, either, because it's very small and surrounded by road work and construction zones.

There are many "hard-core" runners who will run in anything, but I refuse to risk slipping and falling an not being able to run altogether. Many of these runners say that they just go a lot slower, but in my mind, I'd rather be on a treadmill and hit the proper trainnig paces.

I was supposed to run the "Love the Run You're With" 5K on Sunday, but that was rescheduled to Feb. 28. I was glad that it was rescheduled because I don't think the roads will be safe to run on by then-- especially at 5K race pace. Unfortunately, I don't know if I will be able to do the race on the 28th. That's three weeks out from the marathon and I need to do my last 20-mile run. My options are to do the 20-miler on Saturday and then volunteer at the race on Sunday. Or, I could take a few hours off of work in the middle of the week to do my 20-miler, and then race on Sunday. I'll just have to see how things play out with the weather and the rest of my training.

Speaking of Pacers, my bio is now up on the Pacers web site. Click here to see it!

Despite the snow, my weekly mileage has been where I wanted it to be. My training log is here.
Week of Jan. 18: 54
Week of Jan. 25: 56
Week of Feb. 1: 55

This week is a cutback week, with a goal of 43 miles.

Last weekend, I was supposed to do a 20-miler. This would have been the second of three 20-milers in the training program. On Saturday, it was impossible to even leave my house, so I opted to do this on a treadmill on Sunday. My fiance drove me to the gym (his car is better in snow, and I really don't like driving in it). I was mentally prepared for 20 miles, because I had read Facebook status updates and blogs of other runners who had done 20 on a treadmill on Saturday. I was one of the only people at the gym, and I was determined.

After 12 miles, the power went out, and they were forced to evacuate the gym. Sadly, I had to go home, where I had no power either. I took a shower, changed into comfy clothes, and had a small bowl of Ben and Jerry's. Just then, the power came back on. I was cursing myself for not having started until later. But I guess I had no way to know. So, I changed into some fresh running clothes and headed down to the treadmill in my neighborhood fitness center. I don't like this treadmill as much as being at my gym, but it did the job for the remaining 8 miles.

It was disappointing to not do a 20-miler, but I did reach 55 miles for the week, and I guess that 12 + 8 is better than just 12.

Another run of note was a 6-mile tempo run about a week ago. I ran a total of 10.5 miles, with the middle six being at an average pace of 7:50. Ironically, this is faster than my 10K PR pace, and I felt like I could have gone faster. I made certain to keep my heart rate in the Lactate Threshold zone for maximum training benefit. (For some reason, I just have never been able to race a 10K anywhere close to my true ability. I've tried a bunch of different pacing strategies, but a 7:53 average pace has been the best I have ever done. I probably won't run one again until June, when it will be too hot to get a PR. . . . )

I just hope that I will be able to get one more long run in on the trail before my taper starts in two and a half weeks.

Pacers Ambassador

I was thrilled to learn that I was recently accepted into the Pacers Ambsasador program. Pacers is a local running store here in Northern Va. with retail shops in Arlington, Fairfax and Alexandria. They also host quite a few local races, including the 4-miler that I recently ran on New Years Eve.

I was excited to learn about the Pacers Ambassador program on their web site and I eagerly applied. It seemed like they were looking for runners who were active in the running community-- both locally and online through social networking. One of the criteria is that you run a minimum of eight races per year. I think I average about 12 races per year, so that one is easy for me.

I'm not sure how many people were selected (I guess I will find out at the kickoff party in a few weeks) but I feel very honored to be representing Pacers because I really like their stores and their races.

I've committed to wear their racing uniform in at least eight races in 2010 and also to volunteering at some of their events. This is a great way for me to become more involved in the community, while also enjoying some nice perks from Pacers. Meanwhile, I have decided to not participate in the Brooks ID program that I blogged about a few months ago for the 2010 year.

The marathon is in exactly seven weeks. My biggest goal between now and then is to not get injured. Even if I only ran 40 miles a week each week until the race, I am confident that I would still BQ. My motto is going to be to always listen to my body and not push it now that I have done so much hard work.

Based on my heart rate and how my runs feel, I think that I can definitely run a BQ time, and perhaps even something like a 3:37. My "recovery" pace has sped up to 9:30 and my "easy" pace is about 9:00. This is all based on the heart rate zones that I was tested for during my VO2 test last summer.

A huge confidence booster was an 18-mile run last weekend including 6 at marathon pace. I ran 11 miles, 6 at goal pace, and then 1 cooldown. The marathon pace miles averaged 8:18 and they felt great! My heart rate stayed in zone 3, which means I wasn't working too hard for that pace. I'll probably need a Garmin pace of 8:18 or faster to yield a race pace of 8:24 due to all the weaving that goes on in a marathon. I will probably run 26.4 miles based on my Garmin. Anyway, the average pace for the full 18 miles was 8:48 and the run felt wonderful with no lingering soreness the next day. Of course I had perfect running weather, so I just pray that the weather is decent on March 21.

Weekly mileage totals are as follows:
Week of Dec. 28: 47 miles
Week of Jan. 4: 36 miles (recovery week)
Week of Jan. 11: 51 miles
Week of Jan. 18: 54 miles
Week of Jan. 25: 56 miles

Next week I will target 55-56 miles and then I get another recovery week. They are predicting snow and freezing rain for next Saturday, which puts my 20+ miler in jeopardy. I've found that my treadmill maximum is about 16 before my legs just feel to tired from the repetition.

I'm running the "Love the Run You're With" 5K on Sunday, February 14 with my fiance. A few weeks later, I have a 5-mile tune up race. And then the marathon!

New Years Run-o-lutions

I'm probably a little late for a New Year's resolutions blog. But I was enjoying a Caribbean cruise for the first week of 2010 and I have also been busy planning my wedding.

The cruise was so much fun! It was basically a lot of relaxing, eating, drinking and gambling. Running wise, I had scheduled a "cutback" week, so I only had to run three times on the trip-- Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Each day I did an 8-mile run. Thankfully, there was a track on the upper deck that indicated 5 laps equaled one mile. This meant 40 laps around the track. Every time I started to get bored, I just remembered how nice it was to be looking at the ocean, and how it was better than the 30-degree weather we were having back home. And far better than being on a treadmill.

As for my running goals in 2010, the only goal that I am really focused on is qualifying for Boston. I have been after this goal for over a year now, and due to circumstances beyond my control, I have not qualified. I think that my training and my fitness level indicate that a BQ is possible, but I do need the right racing conditions (i.e. no hypothermia and no overheating in 70-degree weather. . . and no major injuries during training!).

If I BQ at the Shamrock marathon in March, I feel like I can cut back on the high mileage and start focusing on shorter, faster stuff. And more importantly, I will be spending most of the spring and summer preparing for my wedding, which includes selling my condo, buying a new house and moving. If it doesn't happen for me in March, then I'll give it another go at the St. Jude Memphis marathon. I also entered the NYC marathon lottery, but I will likely run that as a "fun run" if I am accepted.

In my immediate future, I have a 5K in mid-February and a 5-miler as a tune-up race two weeks before the marathon. I should be able to PR in both distances, based on where I think I am fitness-wise.

Training for the past few weeks has been as follows:

Week of Dec. 14: 40 miles

Week of Dec. 21: 44 miles

Week of Dec. 28: 48 miles (including a 4-mile race)

Week of Jan. 4: 36 miles

Week of Jan. 11: 51 miles (including a 20-miler)

Week of Jan. 18: 54 miles on schedule

If all goes according to plan, I will peak during the week of February 15 with 57 miles. This is slightly less than what I typically peak at, but I think it's enough to BQ and avoid injury/overtraining. I have three 20+ milers planned, of which I have already completed one. I worry that I will have to miss some long runs due to snow and ice on the trail. Of course there is always the treadmill, but 15 is about the max I can handle on there without my legs hurting from the repetition.

Anyway, I am looking forward to a happy, healthy year of running and romance with my future husband.

New Year's Eve 4

To finish of a strong year of running in 2009, I ran the Fairfax Four Miler on New Year's Eve. I had run the inaugural race last year and I really enjoyed it. Last year, the race was run during a wind advisory and the course had to be changed at the last minute due to a down power line. It had been changed to a one-mile loop run four times.

This year, the original course was used, but I had no experience with it due to last year's change. The weather was in the mid 30's and rainy. The forecast had been for freezing rain, so in the days leading up to the race I figured I might not actually run it. In fact, two days before the race, I ran an intense set of 5 x 1000m intervals at a 7:11 pace. Normally, I wouldn't do this so close to a race, but I was fairly certain that the freezing rain would deter me from participating.

On Thursday morning and throughout the day, it looked like it was going to be cold rain and not freezing rain, so my fiance and I decided to go for it. We shivered at the start line as the rain fell down on us. I did not have high expectations for myself. Based on the half marathon that I ran earlier in the month, I should have been able to run a 29:30. However, I excel at long distance races, and my shorter race distance times never "match up" to the equivalent McMillan predictions. Last year, I ran a 30:16, and I figured I would be lucky to do that well again.

The race started and I had a very difficult time weaving through people. My fiance was just behind me, but I lost him in the midst of all the people. We had started relatively close to the start line, and yet there were swarms of slower runners blocking the way. For the first three minutes, my pace averaged a 9:00. As soon as I had passed most of these runners, I just took off. I ran a 7:00 pace for the rest of that mile and ended up averaging 7:30. The next mile was the fastest, I ran it as hard as I could, although I had to occasionally slow down for pockets of ice on the road. We ran one lap around a track, which was a nice relief from the icy road. During that time, I was averaging about 7:12, and it felt great. I am fairly confident that if the race was held on that track I would have done significantly better. Mile 2 averaged 7:15. The next mile was a bit tougher for me with some large uphills that I wasn't expecting. I logged a 7:30. At the end of that mile, I felt very strong and and was prepared to really gun it in for the finish.

However, the hills continued. The last mile just murdered my time. The problem was that there were so many long hills that I hadn't anticipated. The last mile seemed to be all uphill! Normally, I make up some of my time on the downhills, but in this case, the road was wet and icy in places, so I was afraid to really give it my all on the downhills. I crossed the finish line at a disappointing 30:35. My fiance followed about 20 seconds later. He said he had kept me in sight until about the last half mile, when the largest hill came.

Although I wasn't happy with my time, I was pleased with my performance and how I felt. I felt very strong, I felt like I gave it all I had, and beating my fiance is no easy task. He recently murdered me in a 5K and a 10K, so I know I had to have put out a strong performance. Usually I like to measure my performance by age group ranking, but the results weren't presented in such a way that I could determine that. I placed 147 of 1095 runners, both male and female. I counted 27 females who finished ahead of me, but I have no idea how many total runners were female. Another thing that felt great about this race was that almost nobody passed me. I passed a bunch of runners in the beginning and that trend continued throughout the race. Often times, I would pick out people to pace off of during the uphills so as not to slow down, but then I would end up passing them. For this reason, I feel like I did very well, although the watch indicates otherwise.

Overall it was a very fun evening. Going into it, I wasn't all that excited about putting out a race effort in cold, rainy, dark conditions, but it was all worth it. My fiance and I went home to crab legs, champagne and Rock Band until we rang in the new year.

Runnin' for the Kids

Background: Running for a Cause
I am the Director of Marketing for a software company called InfinityQS. It's a smallish company with a family-like atmosphere, privately held and with no venture capital funding. As such, we have the freedom to donate as much as we would like to charity. A few years ago, the company decided to make St. Jude Children's Research Hospital it's charity partner. The company pledged to donate $1 million.

As the Director of Marketing and an avid runner, I had the idea of sponsoring the marathon. Since we had already committed to donating $1 million, I figured that $10,000 of that could go to the marathon as a way to involve our employees. I assembled a team of co-workers, including the CEO himself. My fiance also ran on the team as well as my running partner who had moved to Atlanta last spring.

As a sponsor of the race, we were able to exhibit at the expo. My fiance and I flew down on Thursday morning and set up the exhibit. We weren't really marketing to the runners, but we figured we should take advantage of the opportunity to get our name out to the community. Surprisingly, two users of InfinityQS software approached the booth and told me how great the software was and how much it was helping their company. There were a few other people who were really interested in learning about the software, which was nice.

On Friday, the other team members arrived. Our team raised over $3,000 in addition to the sponsorship money, so there was a lot to be proud of. This includes $500 from one of my Runner's World friends, who raised this money in less than 24 hours!!!! I personally raised $485. The CEO came with his son, his sister, and his brother-in-law. He was excited to be there and to see that we had the exhibit set up.

The Race
The race itself was awesome. The forecast was for low 30's and sunny, so I wore tights, a long-sleeved shirt, gloves and a hat. I probably could have done without the hat, but it turned out to be ideal racing weather. At the start line, my fiance (Greg), my running partner (Lindsay) and I lined up in the coral for the 8:00 pace. The rest of the InfinityQS team was far back as they hadn't really trained and had never run more than a few miles at a time.

Given the fact that I only had 8 weeks to train for this (due to the injury) and that my longest run was only 14 miles, I was not expecting a PR. My 1:44:04 was set after weeks in the 50's and a few 20-milers. Plus, that race was flat and this was hilly. I thought I would be lucky to pull of a 1:46. Lindsay and Greg said that they were going to let me be their pacer and try to keep up as long as possible. I thought that I would probably be the LAST one to finish, given Greg's recent 10K time and Lindsay's training on the hills. But I am good at pacing, so I agreed. My strategy was to start out at 8:05 and try to hold on.

Even though headphones were allowed during this race, I didn't use them. I wanted to be able to communicate with Lindsay and Greg and hear everyone cheering them. This ended up working out great and I think I will continue to race without headphones in races where there is a lot of crowd support.

Miles 1-4
I knew that the first mile had a net uphill elevation and the second mile would be a major loss in elevation. So I ran accordingly. My plan was to maintain an even level of effort, which meant slower on the uphills and faster on the downhills. I think that Lindsay was more comfortable with the hills, so she did not slow down on the uphills. She maintained an even pace. Every time we reached a hill, she would get ahead of me, and then I would typically catch her on the downhill.

Mile 1: 8:07
Mile 2: 7:51
Mile 3: 8:02
Mile 4: 7:48

Miles 5-8
At mile 5, I took a "honey stinger" engery gel. This was my first time using the honey in a race, although I had used it in training. I thought it would be easier and quicker than the sports beans. That was true, but some honey might have gone down the wrong pipe, so I was coughing and having a really tough time. Lindsay and Greg went ahead as I drank some water and re-grouped. I caught back up about 30 seconds later.

Everything was feeling surprisingly good and I started to think that maybe I would get a 1:45. There was a 10K timing mat and I crossed it in 49:36. My 10K PR is not too far off from that. I thought how odd it was that I felt so great at that point, but in a 10K race, I would be dying at that pace. I need to figure out why that is. In the results, they "rank" you at the 10K split. I was ranked 16th in my age group at that point. Lindsay crossed it just ahead of me and was ranked 15th. My fiance Greg was somewhere behind me and I wasn't sure how far. He removed his long sleeved shirt at mile 5 and that slowed him down. He later told me that he had me in sight all the way through mile 9. I thought I had lost him at around the 10K mark.

After crossing the 10K, the was a downhill and I sped down it passing Lindsay. I figured she would catch up but I never saw her again. Surprisingly, I was leading the two of them, which I did not think would be the case. My paces continued to surprise me, but everything felt great.

Mile 5: 7:48
Mile 6: 7:58
Mile 7: 7:52
Mile 8: 7:52

Miles 9-Finish
At this point, I was starting to feel a bit worn out. I knew that miles 8-10 were a net uphill. I told myself to hang in there and once I hit mile 10, the elevation would start to decrease. I decided to eat my sports beans at mile 8, which was earlier than planned. It was a challenge to eat them because when you are breathing so heavily, trying to chew something hard like that and swallow is difficult. I said to myself "eating these beans is crucial to your performance. You need them to get through the rest of the race. Just focus on chewing them and not choking them." I ended up shoving about 8 of them in my mouth at once and throwing out the rest of the pack. Once I was done, I was able to focus more on the race.

There was a huge hill at mile 10. It took a lot of positive self talk. "Maintain an even effort. Don't worry about pace here. You will be able to make it up on the downhills. Stay confident, don't overdo it here. Just focus on getting to the top of the hill and maintaining the effort level." I did have to push a little bit harder because the hill was long and somewhat steep, but once I made it to the top, I knew that I had the race "in the bag". Mile 10 ended up being the slowest mile of the race, but I made up for it in the last mile. I knew I had run a great race strategy because I was able to maintain my pace but I was definitely feeling it. The last two miles were brutal, but I maintained my focused and stayed positive. The last mile of the race ended up being my fastest mile. I thought I might be able to get a PR so I gave it all I had.

Mile 9: 7:54
Mile 10: 8:14
Mile 11: 7:52
Mile 12: 8:04
Mile 13: 7:44
Last 0.21: (7:15 pace)

The Finish

I crossed the finish line knowing that I didn't PR, but I was happy at how close I came. I honestly didn't expect to run the race so quickly. Considering how much hillier this course was than Shamrock, I think this is my strongest half marathon. I could have definitely PRed on a flat course.

Greg crossed the finish line soon after me, and I learned that he had me in his sight up until mile 9. Lindsay followed about a minute later.

My finish time was a 1:44:30 which is a pace of 7:59. This is 26 seconds slower than my PR. My Garmin indicated 13.21 miles at an average pace of 7:55, due to all the weaving.

I was ranked as the 16th woman in my age group at the 10K mark, but at the finish, I was ranked 11th. This means that I passed 5 women in my age group after the 10K mark.

I placed 11 of 762 in my age group, beating 98.6% of them.
I placed 82 out of 4278 women, beating 98.1% of them.

I will definitely be doing this race again, and my company will continue to be a sponsor.